Below are the 3 most recent journal entries recorded in [Phony+Windows = OTP]'s LiveJournal:

Sunday, November 20th, 2005
5:25 pm	Due for an ego-stroking? Name? Diana Age? 17 Location? Ontario, Canada (and simultaneously, as has become apparent after applying to this community, lost in a tide of my own insurmounatable narcissism) Favorite series/movies? (minimum - 5, maximum - 10) (Explaining why may help us in the decision making process) (a stone-age dial-up internet connection on my part, coupled w/ a preference for manga over anime in general, make for a below list comprised largely of manga either b/c the anime was cancelled or has me repeatedly *headdesking* over eye-searingly painful 80s-style animation) 1) Berserk (manga): *Claps hands together in devout thanksgiving that Kentaro Miura had the gaul to come up with such a thoroughly twisted, blood-bath of a plot* Gratuitous nudity, gore, and violence aside, this manga’s discussion of the quality of man, the gains and the tolls of mortal ambitions, the contrasting male and female psyches, and the crushing weight of a dream/a strong disposition hooked me from the get-go. 2) Fullmetal Alchemist (either manga or anime): Cue seven deadly sins, play after play on the Flamel/ Ouroborous insignias (which actually inspired me to pick up a bible w/o the intent for a good eye-roll), you’re token axis mundi (and !holyshit! Cue a second bible consultation), picture-perfect character development, allusions to alchemy’s male/female/divine androgyne (gold/ silver/ mercury) trinity and I’ve got me a fandom (Of course, the dual-amputee for a protagonist and unrivaled yaoi potential doesn’t hurt kink-wise either…) 3) Neon Genesis Evangelion (anime because the manga borders on glorified fanfic): Brain go stop when watch. 4) Angel Sanctuary (manga): So we’ve got a healthy dosage of incestuous siblings, hermaphrodites, transvestites, Sodom/Gomorrah references, a fairly accurate angel hierarchy, drug-tripping artwork to rival Lewis Carrol’s, a complete eradication of respect for the gender barrier (ie. females in male bodies and vice-versa), and more bondage than you can shake a stick at. The icing on the cake is this ‘shojo’ title’s tendency to boast more severed limbs and pages caked in blood than the majority of shounen titles I’ve come across. 5) Trigun (manga): Self-explanatory, really… Almost made me rethink my kleptomania. Almost. *Honourable mentions abound for Generator Gawl, Gravitation, Hellsing, and Ranma ½* Least Favorite series/movie? All things ‘Kenshin’ (excluding OVAs ) Favorite scene/s from an anime (if you think there's a spoiler, name the anime, and then type the description afterwards in a white font)? Evangelion’s BIB, in particular, had my brain seeping out of my ears after bearing witness to Misato’s martyr-esque/masochistic tendencies in full… Also, the voice-acting and animation at the abrupt cut-off of Asuka’s ‘I’ll kill you, I’ll kill you, I’ll kill you’ rant in EoE is def. something I’ll still be attempting to pry out from under my eyelids ten years from now *BIB- the Big irony bomb (NGE-enslaved know the scene) Favorite genre of anime? Shounen to boot. Give me action, action, action over a heartfelt, bittersweet romance any day of the week. And while we’re playing favourites, I’d like to give a warm, appreciative hand to all the mangaka out there featuring 2-page spreads of some guy getting his ass handed to him by an over-sized sword, or gratuitous nc-17 content of any kind in their work. Favorite anime soundtrack? FMA’s Rewrite/ Ready,Steady, Go/ Kesenai Tsumi/ Undo, topped off with overtures that could make even Orland Bloom emote, give it top rank in my book. What was it that got you hooked on anime? *crosses self* back in the ?sixth? grade I sold my soul to Digimon season 01 (Taichi’s unrivaled ass-kickery had me reduced to a wanton little slave for all things even remotely tied in with the colour orange) Do you draw or write fan-fic? I wrote once-upon-a-time… before I joined the ranks of active sporkers on fma_spork (whom I intend on nominating for sainthood due to the mass amounts of canon-rape they so devoutly tear apart on a daily basis) Would you consider yourself an Otaku? If its possible to be a closet!otaku! LIEKWHOA!11!…then yes. Do you read Manga (or anything similar)? If so, what series is your favorite? (See: ‘fav. Series' response) Do you attend anime(ish) conventions? If so, have you ever Cos-played? Cosplayed, no. Crossplayed, yes. In an ideal world, I’d walk the streets of downtown Toronto dressed in a black mid-drift bearing top, mini-skirt (also black), and a green palm-tree-esque wig (a la envy/evil incarnate of fma fandom who makes androgyny fun for the whole family) Do you own any cool anime-based stuff? In spades. Starting with 250+ volumes of manga and ending w/ the eye-searing awesomeness that is pile upon pile of uke!ed doujinshi (Pardon me while I hasten to build a shrine in the divine likeness of all kindred, pervy, yaoi-enslaved fangirls) How'd you hear about our community? Frantic search for an Eva-discussion/essay-related community on livejournal (or anywhere on the net for that matter). As it turns out, this community pops up after a search for ‘evangelion’ under ‘community interests.’ (I was equally sickened and intrigued to find a comm. like this existed) Subbed or dubbed(English)? My own select brand of vendetta consisting of me hunting Richard Cox, and Monica Storie down for the sole purpose of inflicting a particularly crude machete to the throat would- in my opinion- place me firmly on the subbed side of the proverbial fence For one day, and one day only, Non-Ugly Anime has granted you the power to become an anime character. Who are you? At the risk of sounding Mary-Sue-like in any way, shape, or form, I’ll be going with Gatsu of Berserk fame simply because he rules really fucking hard. Series you are trying to finish right now? Elfen Lied (and by finish I mean start what with school and a social life currently eating up all potential planting-self-in-front-of-comp-for-nights-on-end-to-finish-[insert series here]-time) Series that you keep coming back to? Evangelion owing largely to repeated counts of mind-fuckery, Asuka continually owning my soul, and the on-going Shinji debate (ie. hero or anti-hero?.. Which begs the question(*cough* Misato), is it heroic to martyr yourself over an anti-hero?)….etc,etc Why do you enjoy anime as opposed to other types of "shows"? In layman’s terms, it has substance. Something decidedly lacking in all other mediums of entertainment these days. If you could take any anime male/female to bed with you for one night, who would it be? Give me twisted, unrepenting, and hopelessly cocky (b/c in my experience, familiarity hardly breeds contempt) and I’ll have the mini-skirt donning deadly sin of Envy to help me satisfy my endless list of kinks. Asuka comes in a close second, knocking Edward Elric (regardless of his horribly, attractive amputee appeal) clear out of the running Do you watch AMVs? If so, which one is your favorite? ?Tyler’s? Tsumibito no kashou. And yes, I do plan to violently rape ‘Tyler’ for the genius of splicing Placebo’s Protégé Moi and various FMA clips into a single mind-blowing entity Do you approve of all the anime that is being brought to Cartoon Network? Why or why not? No. Just no. Naruto never particularly peaked my interest in subbed form, then they go and dub it and *bam* I’m praying nightly that CN never rears its head on the Canadian cable block Anything you would like to say to prove that you're actually an anime fan, or something to make you stand out to us as far as anime is concerned? Also, what will you bring to this community if accepted? I’ve been known to have Scott Mcneil (ie. the man, the myth, and the legend of American VA ranks) sign my boobs on a routine basis and am well on my way to establishing seiyuu-groupie as a career choice for all the dangerously obsessed otaku out there… Always up for discussions- ones hopefully provoking a semblance of thought- pertaining to any of my listed favs. Cue year-old pics: *explanation for close-up shots of my boobs falling out of my shirt. They’re signed by scott mcneil. Enough said. *Currently in the running for least photogenic person ever. I plan on climbing all the way to the number 1 slot, bitch.* (14 Comments |Comment on this)
Saturday, October 22nd, 2005
12:32 pm	speaking of new reasons to play in traffic: http://www.canada.com/edmonton/edmo...2f-39d0d3fbcdf0 Man sentenced in cartoon child porn case Edmonton Journal October 19, 2005 A 26-year-old Edmonton man has been spared jail time in what is believed to be the first case of cartoon child pornography in Canada. Gordon Chin pleaded guilty in provincial court today to importing thousands of pages of a Japanese cartoon called Anime featuring characters that look like Pokemon and Astro Boy engaging in explicit sex acts. He purchased the cartoon over the Internet. Police seized 15 comic books in Vancouver destined for his Edmonton address. They also seized 63 more books at his Edmonton home and four binders of the cartoon printed off the Internet. Some of the scenes reviewed in court featured adult cartoon characters having sex with tied up children, some in diapers. Other scenes portrayed adults using weapons while raping babies. “Why would anyone want to look at stuff like this?” asked an angry Judge David Tilley. “I don’t think this is the kind of filth that should be available to the public.” But he agreed to spare Chin any jail time because production of the cartoons didn’t involve the actual exploitation of real children. He handed Chin an 18-month conditional sentence, to be served in the community. Chin will also have to do 100 hours of community service. Anime is illegal in Canada but not illegal in Japan and the United States. Defence lawyer D’arcy Depoe said Chin didn’t know the cartoon was illegal here. © Edmonton Journal 2005 *at a loss for words* ...partly due to my brain exploding on two counts of: a)the eye-searing substitution of 'anime' for 'doujinshi'... b)the fact that relatively harmless roy/ed fangirls can now be deemed criminally responsible for, say... http://i9.photobucket.com/albums/a72/miaslave/un1.jpg (NOT WORKSAFE IN ANY WAY SHAPE OR FORM)... ...or maybe http://i9.photobucket.com/albums/a72/miaslave/un3.jpg (equally far from worksafe) my being a wanton slave to envy/ed would make me- what?...a candidate for 500x the jailtime the average '30-something-yr-old-fictional-character/prepubescent-fictional-character' fan would be? (29 Comments |Comment on this)
Sunday, September 11th, 2005
4:44 am	liek s00o tEh Taboo!!11 Party @ highest peak of tallest office building tonight. Drinks on me. B.Y.O.Suicidal-plummeting-to-messy-death-on-busy-intersection-attire. We have a new leading cause of death in North America people: Title: Life At Central (and ironically, the end of mine in the real world due to true-to-life, relentlessmotherfuckermarysue’s like…) Author: BikkyTheGreat (whom- I can only assume from the pronounced lack of the ‘a’ word in her namesake- is alchemically subdued outside of her writing) Full Name (plus titles if any): loLZ its all about U, hun!11!! Full Species(es): samuraius alchemistus (samurai. that’s right. Samurai.) Hair Color (include adjectives): not specified Eye Color (include adjectives): not specified. Though roy’s ARE an alluring shade of charcoal (the not black variety of charcoal, obviously) Unusual Markings/Colorations: not specified Special Possessions (if any): a hard-put (though undoubtedly attractive) face with a tendency towards being a real glutton for punishment (see fic carwreck for details…) Which Gate It Came From: The gate of soon-to-be convicted child rapists, and time-traveling mary-sue’s Connections To Canon Characters: liek Edo!tehsex is my inspiration 4 lerning all teh alkemy! & being wanton dog of stAte lolz!!1 Special Abilities: ability to near cream herself at a family-photo of a minor playing dress-up Other Annoying Traits: 30 second memorybank/30 second attention span/ tendency to get wet from the thought of doing terrible-wonderful things to elysia-chan within a mere 30 seconds that said thoughts come to mind Some of the worst of this story: Chapter 1: A New Alchemist reason to play in traffic It was another day at Central for you. You had just become another dog of the state and after shapeshifting into an entirely separate species so many times prior to today, the situation was getting pretty tired. You couldn’t believe that you of all people were picked to spend a long string of days at central as opposed to the single day endeavors you had seemed accustomed to in the 1st sentence of the fic. And now you had been assigned to a Roy Mustang which you couldn’t help feeling a slight bit uneasy about. Unable to shirk this sinking feeling that a ‘he’ would prove far less terrifying to be assigned to than an ‘a’. “Um, excuse me.” You softly approached a man in ?the? blue uniform, who was wearing glasses and whom, judging by the particular colour of uniform and taste in eyewear, seemed the type fervently opposed to rough approaches of any kind. “Yes?” He gave you a warm smile. The exothermic variety of facial expression you find yourself more than hard-pressed to unearth anywhere other than the fma fandom. “I’m looking of a Roy Mustang (too far gone a sentence fragment to even begin…). I’ve been just assigned there- to Roy Mustang the place, not to be confused with Roy Mustang the person, by any means.” You told him. “Ah, Roy. Well I can escort you there (he seems well acquainted with your destination. After all, it and his childhood chum share the same namesake!lolz!). I’m on my way there too I’ve been ‘looking of’ Roy Mustang for a while myself, but it’s like tuwtally a military hotspot and we shuld like hyte that shyte up 2gethr11!!.” “Really! Thank you so much!111!!” Your face lit up with excitement causing the blue-uniformed man to raise an eyebrow. Exothermic facial expressions, sure…but such an intensely blinding chemical reaction from an entire face? The abrupt jumble of numbers and punctuation for a response, didn’t exactly help put his mind at ease either. “Don’t thank me. I’m just doin' my job which btw permits sudden jumps from a vocabulary consisting of perfect English, to the vernacular of an elementary school dropout. And look, this is my daughter Elysia! Isn’t she so cute! There she is wearing her Mommy’s hat, and putting on her make up!” He shoved a picture of his daughter in your face which would prove difficult for even the most skilled medics to remove in emergency later that evening. “Awe! She’s so cute!” You smiled creamed yourself, and couldn’t keep your eyes off the picture...a little old for your taste, maybe... but the dress-up def. made amends for any not-minor-enough thoughts to put a damper on this promising new fantasy. “Isn’t she? And when she goes to bed, I have to read her a bed time story, otherwise she won’t go to sleep.” “Awe! That’s so cute hott like nekked mansekks! I would like to meet rape her! If that’s alright with you!” You were getting so wrapped up in off from his stories of his potentially wet, writhing, wanton little girl , that you didn’t even hear your name being called. “Elysia looooves meeting new people convicted rapists.” “Major Hughes!” A voice yelled (apparently disembodied). You and Hughes stopped eye-raping hughes’ daughter, and turned around to find another military officer with black hair and charcoal eyes standing there (you know, at that spot the author’s previously introduced you to). You blush slightly at his good looks, and not just because eyecolour+fossil fuel=TeH!seX!11!!!…but because the story has suddenly teleported itself into the present-tense. “Roy, this is your newest addition, the Samurai Alchemist (*impressed whistle* time travel these days…and all the way from the feudal era? Imagine that!).” Hughes told the dark hair alchemist (because you seem to have had a memory relapse in the past 5? seconds and can’t recall your commanding officer’s name). Your face dropped open (ouch. The whole face too…the samurai alchemist was short-lived at least). You never told him anything about yourself (and again: whoops. Guess you’ll never get that chance, what w/ the recent ‘unpleasantness’ face dropping). “Why such a long dropped open face? I am head of the investigation department. It’s my job to know what’s going around here.” Hughes explained. “Oh, is that so?” You flatly responded (superfluous adjective alert. At least you’d refrained from responding jaggedly), not quite sure how to make out of this situation or whether to ‘make out’ w/ roy or Hughes, or both at once- if you couldn’t get ahold of hughes’ daughter in time- since both would be willing when it came to a liekOMFGHAwT Miss Mary Sue like yourself, and either scenario would result in putting a flailing halt to this most dreadful situation’s awkwardness. “So you’re the new alchemist part of team (evidently, prior to your arrival, the part of your simpy-titled, ‘team’ that went by ‘alchemist’, had been vacant), well it’s good to have you aboard.” Roy turned to you because he was getting strange vibes from carrying on a conversation w/ someone mere feet away, that he’d been making a deliberate effort not to face. “Yes sir!” You saluted. Roy returned the salute the following day- he had a receipt- and gave you a smile which you pocket instantly because this is the first tangible facial expression you’ve been able to be on the receiving end of in a while ever. “Follow me.” Roy told fucked you sideways (why not?). “Yes sir!” You followed after him. He led you into his office where you proceeded to have wild/animal/desk/elysia-role-playing sex before he pulled out long enough to allow you to meet the rest of the team. There was Lieutenant Hawkeye, Lieutenant Havoc, Lieutenant Breda, Warrant Officer Falman, and !finally! Sergeant Feury (my god, you thought you’d never get through the whole FIVE introductions. Go lie down for a bit. Don’t get up). This was now your new team for awhile- as opposed to before when it had been your old team. “Oh, and a peep squeak (madameoiselle, ‘aven’t yue watched the series arc that goes into le detail aboot roy’s francophone heritage?), Fullmetal is under my command too.” The Colonel added on. You couldn’t believe it (no really. fucking 6 introductions in fucking the same 5 minutes!!) Thee Fullmetal, I knight thee in the name of king, country, and etc…! The youngest alchemist to be accepted by the military. He’s what inspired you to learn all you can about alchemy (to divert so much attention to said subject that you- resultantly- failed to learn enough about the English language to determine that jumping between the past and present tense in the middle of the !same fucking sentence! is generally frowned upon), and take the alchemy exam (but that was kinda a spur-o-the-moment thing anyways…). You wanted to meet bone him so bad, and now you learn he’s kind of part of the same team as you (but kindasortanot entirely. Its highly probable there was a reason for that delayed- and painfully drawn out- introduction). It was a my dream nightmare come true. Sincerely, Satan (6 Comments |Comment on this)